Weeds: Destructively Delicious

First off: my apologies for such an absence of pictures with one big wall of text in the last blog post. I got sucked into the flow state rabbit hole and my creative juices went ham on the text. Here's my redemption:

Image source

Spongebob is a great example to use in many contexts, but today I'm choosing this image to speak about something important about the weeds in our garden:

They're delicious.

Well, they often are, and it's important for us to be aware of this deliciousness in order to reflect on each other and ourselves, properly, regarding WHY we indulge in our weeds so frequently.

"But Jeffrey, what's a weed again?"

A "Weed" as described with The Project Eden Covenant is any negative attitude towards either ourselves or others that denies the person goodwill, love, or care.

Really, it's "Contempt":

(I friggin' LOVE chatGPT for quick answers for stuff)

Wow, weeds are really harmful! Why are they delicious?

Let's explore:

Think of when you're driving.

Image Source

Is there ever a moment when you feel anger towards another driver? Of course there is. People cut us off, drive selfishly, and tailgate all the time. We find ourselves thinking (or saying out loud in our car to ourselves) "they're an asshole". MOST of us would likely have at least some venom in our mouths against the people we think deserve it. This response is 100% automatic. We didn't consciously choose to start being mad at them. It just happened.

Doesn't that spite taste good? Doesn't it feel "Right" to hold that negativity towards them? They're doing something potentially dangerous, so I'm doing the moral good here, right?

Let's be clear: the weed showed up of it's own doing, but very often we say "Yes" to it because the anger in the moment demands the energy goes somewhere, it needs to blow its steam.

There is clearly a psychological need to be able to process these emotions of anger and resentment when they show up within us. Projecting the anger outwards is usually our first impulse at satisfying this need.

The problem is that when we're faced with this need to process the emotion, we aren't thinking of prudent psychological strategies that help us get to the most optimal eventual outcome. We aren't thinking logically. In fact: we literally AREN'T THINKING.

The "Fight or flight" part of the brain is called the Amygdala, and neurobiologically, the activation of the amygdala "turns off" the higher-thinking part of the brain, the Prefrontal Cortex:

So it's not really our fault we aren't thinking properly when we're angry or in a moment of stress, that "Fight or flight" response. It's in our nature to be kind of a stupid ape in these moments. We should never blame ourselves or others for suddenly halting their intelligence in these moments because our biology is working against us.

It happens to me, to you, to everyone who hasn't yet mastered this inner mechanism (likely 99.99% of people).

Now let's bring this concept to a more significant context than our moments of road rage.

I was on the phone with my Iranian friend the other day regarding the ongoing conflict that's happening in Iran right now. He mentioned that a senior clergy of the Islamic Republic of Iran had been killed in a bank by a guard. The view he was approaching the news was that this is a positive impact towards the cause for the Iranian people who are being abused by the totalitarian religious regime of the country.

My response was not aligned with his stance: I felt that murdering someone in cold blood is not a good thing, even in this context.

Some emotions came up, but I maintained some Socratic questioning, which arrived us at a number of realizations. It sounded something like this:

Me: So if this killing is so helpful, what's it helping with?

Friend: It's important because it's sending a message to the rest of the clergy that they should be afraid.

Me: So the objective with killing this clergy member is to create fear?

Friend: Yes

Me: So fear has been increased in the rest of the clergy that hear about the news of this killing, and that's what we want to aim for?

Friend: Yes

Me: And what impact will this fear have on the abusers?

Friend: It will make them think twice about hurting people.

Me: Is that the case? Is that what happens when an abusive person is put in a position of fear? What would you do if you put yourself in their shoes? Having one of your peers killed in cold blood? What would you want to do?

Friend: I'd get angry.

Me: And what behaviours would that anger motivate?

Friend: Probably more violence and abuse

Me: So given these outcomes, is this killing really worth it?

Friend: Well not really

Me: Then why is it so important that we CELEBRATE this murder? Even if it's someone on the side of the abuser, what does this murder help with?

Friend: Because the Iranian people are sick and tired of being treated this way

Me: And so what does killing someone accomplish?

Friend: It at least makes us feel better to get revenge on the people responsible

Bingo. We arrived on an important fact: we enjoy our weeds. We love the taste.

One of my favourite films, Kill Bill Vol.1, touches on this very nerve of how satisfying it is to get revenge.

There are times where we reach for retribution, to claim vindication, to be the hero, and there's something satisfying about it.

This is because of simple logic:

Self-Expression is one of the elemental needs, it's something we hunger for. It needs to be nourished.

In our garden metaphor, Self-expression is represented by the idea of "plants in our garden".

A weed (judgement) is a plant, therefore a weed helps to satisfy this basic need for self-expression.

This venomous attitude towards the "enemy" gives us the feeling that we're active, that we're doing something.

It FEEDS us to judge when we feel it's directed correctly.

The issue with this is that we often fail to notice the subsequent results that a weed has in the garden: it blocks our ability to think, to learn, to ask questions. It halts our higher faculties of problem solving and replaces it with reactionary, emotional impulses.

We become less human, and more animal. It's a survival instinct.

Does the world need more impulsive, emotional people?

The most important thing with when our weeds take us over is that we aren't really in control anymore. Something takes us over and we're on autopilot. Whatever free will we had to begin with is all but lost and our animal instincts are now driving the bus.

With our objective faculties turned off, can we hope to build anything? To solve problems with prudent critical thinking? Can we ever hope to achieve diplomacy?

This is why weeds are a critical area to focus on when we want to achieve peace, in any scale or context, whether it be between two people or two countries. The weeds of the garden simply make things worse for everyone, and they move us away from true flourishing in life.

It's incredibly important to identify when we fall into a pattern of celebrating the contempt we hold for other people, because that's like a gardener who celebrates the appearance of weeds in their garden because it makes them feel like they're growing something.

Celebrating a weed in the garden might be easy to fall into because perhaps the plants we're trying to grow aren't where we want them to be. We feel hungry to express ourselves in some way, and any chance to indulge in our self-expression, as costly as it might be, is inviting and easy to grab onto. We shouldn't blame ourselves for these moments, but it would be irresponsible of us to ignore any due efforts we must put in to remain mindful and vigilant to remove our weeds so we can address social issues with more openness, calmness, and sound thinking.

That's it. Blog post done. I love you.